Value of a Day

Value of a Day

written by: Pat Heydlauff
by: Pat Heydlauff
Mother-daughter3 Mother-daughter3

A friend of mine lost her Mother about two years ago and was recently telling

me how difficult it still is for her to deal with her loss and what an empty spot it

left in her heart. Besides being a precious friend she is a loving wife, devoted

Mother to her own young teen daughter, an accomplished medical doctor and

quite active in her child's school as well as community affairs. Yet she lamented,

"So that's all there is to life, you are born, you grow up, raise your own family

and like Mother, you die."

I could feel her pain and emptiness; they are no stranger to most of us at some

point in our lives. Many of my readers, students and clients have already lost

parents, are in the process of loosing them one by one or will be in this position

over the next number of years. Losing loved ones, especially parents often

serves to put one's life into perspective and can be a positive life altering event.

The "rights of passage" of moving from being an adult child to being the

caregiver for a parent and then becoming the senior adult head of the family

can be an overwhelming and unanticipated burden. It can significantly zap

emotions, physical well-being and your energy if you do not mentally plan

for such major energy shifts in your life, plus do not have a good perspective

on your value as a human being.

An Ounce of Prevention

No matter what your age, the time to begin is now. Positive Feng Shui energy

is created by planning ahead so you have no regrets when the end is near.

Now is when you say all those good kind and loving things to parents and loved

ones so that one day in the future you will not find yourself wishing you would

have done so before they were gone. Tell them how much you appreciate them

not just for what they've done for you but for the type of person they are. Even

if they are not an exemplary parent or spouse, there are little things you can

find to thank them for. Make a list and tell them with each visit or phone call, or

write a letter. It doesn't matter how you do it, just do it.

If you've already lost your loved one, write a letter filled with loving memories

and all the "thank you things" you can think of. Add to it over the days if necessary.

Sign the letter, put it into an envelope and tuck it into a small memories box or

photo album with pictures of your loved one. You will find that just the act of writing

the letter will release you from perhaps years of guilt. Whether you do it in advance

or after the fact, the result is the same for you. You will no longer carry around guilt

and will no longer have the "I wish I would have said..." regrets.

Is that all there is?

At this stage in life, many people struggle with the "is that all there is" question.

This is truly a question each and every person needs to find the answer to because

how you answer this question will determine how you will spend the remaining years

of your life. In fact, the earlier in your life you find the answer to this question the more peace filled your life will be. Try using the following two universal energy principles to

seek your answer to the question "is that all there is."

Maintain a "GRATITUDE ATTITUDE" to get you through or prepare you for the hard

days of your immediate loss. Find anything you can to be grateful for even if you need

to think of simple things like; it isn't raining or it finally is raining, or the refrigerator is full of food because you just went shopping or even the peaceful beauty of the new fallen snow depending on where you live and what time of year it is.

You can even begin a gratitude journal to help you record all of the wonderful

memories together with the person you just lost, adding to it as often as you think of

something new. Be sure however to bring your gratitude journal into the present so

you recognize the value of today. Every day is filled with hundreds of positive things.

Be aware of your good fortune every hour of the day and record it. You will learn to experience and appreciate every precious moment. Remember, you exchange a day of your life for what you do today.


For most people, only once you have lost a loved one or gone through great trauma

do you appreciate the gift of life and the value of a day. Times like these provide you

an open door to self discovery. Only through self discovery will you be able to find

your answer to "is that all there is." Get in touch with your creative side so your left

brain logical self will not stand in your way; paint, write, sculpt, sketch, day dream

sitting on the beach or lakeside or, light a candle in a quiet corner of your home and

just stare into the beautiful flame. Treat your life as the precious gift it is and allow self discovery to bloom.

The value of a day is exactly the price you pay for it. What you do today you do in

exchange for another day of your life. Maintain your gratitude attitude for all the good

in each day and go on a self discovery journey that will lead you toward peace and

joy within.